Happy New Beginnings
“Happy New Beginnings” For most of my adult life, that’s been a bit of how I viewed each turn of the December to January calendar. A fresh start, a chance to reflect and commit to a new path forward.
“This year is a book of clean blank pages on which I will write a record of my experiences and my growth…”
I’m noticing two small things that have shifted for me in the past few years that make this day less “significant.”
#1: Each breath is now my January 1st - a chance to begin again.
Shift #1: I’ve realized that every month, every day, every moment is an opportunity to move more closely to the person that I desire to be. Either my making a move away from something or a move toward something. I don’t need January 1st to roll around to make a far-reaching goal that I often accelerate toward for a few weeks and then fall off the wagon.
I can make more intentional promises to myself and can refresh and renew them in the moment whenever I recall them.
Last year, my two intentions were TRUST and HERE. When I noticed I was getting “tight” about something, I remembered and often whispered the word TRUST to myself. So much of my waking moments were spent trying to align the stars of the future (and work through plan A, B, C & D). TRUST was my reminder that while I don’t always know how things will work, I can trust in my own ability to meet whatever comes.
HERE was my heart’s wish to be as present as I could to whatever was going on. This would often be a word that could bring me back to the present moment. A reminder to feel the weight of my body sitting, hear the the sounds in the room or notice the sensations of my breath.
In a very different way from the historical approach I had with resolutions, neither of these had an end point or happened in the future. Whenever I remembered, I brought that quality to the moment to the best of my ability at that time. And that was enough. Those two words were my thread that I did my best to stay connected to throughout 2022.
#2- My intentions are now about doing less and being more of me
#2) Looking back, my resolutions were often tinged with a need to “fix” me - lose weight, go the gym, stop cursing. A subtle reminder that who I was wasn’t quite good enough. Adding another activity to my plate in an attempt to better myself.
Now my “intentions” are more rooted in love and kindness for myself. What can I take off my plate to offer space to myself? Where do I feel the most free - can I find more of that? How can I let the goodness that is me unfold in the most beautiful way?
(Now that’s a radical departure!) I wouldn’t have even been able to wrap my head around this concept without my self-compassion practice over the past two years. This practice has radically changed how I interact with myself (and therefore with everyone I come into contact with).
I saw this post shared by Donna Ashworth and I loved her message:
Why do we start a new year with promises to improve?
Who began this tradition of never-ending pressure?
I say the end of the year should be filled with congratulation for we all survived.
And I say a new year should start with promises to be kinder to ourselves, to understand better just how much we bear, as humans, on this exhausting treadmill of life.
And if we are to promise more, let’s pledge to rest before our bodies force us.
Let’s pledge to stop and drink in life as it happens
Let’s pledge to strip away a layer of perfection to reveal the flawed and wonderous humanity as we truly are inside.
Why start another year gifted to us on this earth, with demand on our already overstrained humanity? When we could be learning to accept, that we were always supposed to be imperfect and that is where the beauty actually lies.
And if we can only find that beauty, we would also find peace
My deepest wish for each of you is that you go a bit easier on yourself in 2023. You’re doing a great job
